The Other Shoe

Does anyone else do this? I was just about ready to head to bed tonight when the mackerdoodle awoke throwing up. There’s a stomach virus going around the neighborhood and it looks as if she caught a wee strain. I got her cleaned up, her bed cleaned up, and fresh sheets and jammies in place, and now she’s fast asleep again.

But I can’t go to sleep.

I’m tired. I’d love to curl up in my bed and let my eyes fall shut, but my brain is telling me: “It’s never this easy. Either she’s going to throw up again, or another doodle will join the fray. You’re in for a long night, so why even bother?” It’s irrational, and even sinful inasmuch as I am borrowing trouble that may never come. Here I sit. Yawning. Blinking the long blinks. Waiting for the other shoe to drop.

The thing is: if I go to bed tonight I could sleep all night, but I will certainly sleep until the much anticipated shoe drops. I may be tired, but I’m guaranteed to be less tired than if I stay up all night waiting for the vomit that may never come. Isn’t this exactly the point Jesus was making when he told us not to be anxious? Worrying can’t add a single hour to my life, but it can make a lot of the already written hours of my life completely miserable.

Ok self. I hear you. I’m off to bed. Each day has enough shoes of its own. Why wait for one that may never drop?

About Coralie

After 11 years of infertility, I am now a mother to three, a wife of a Presbyterian (ARP) preacher and a struggling homemaker. Welcome to my little corner of the net. Kick off your shoes, put your feet up and join the conversation. View all posts by Coralie

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