I have a thousand (give or take 990) drafts sitting, abandoned and lonely, in my blog dashboard. When the children were tiny, I blogged almost every evening after they went to sleep. I came to the end of the day physically exhausted, but mentally hungry after the demands of caring for toddlers and infants. I would sit my weary body in a chair and rest my fingers on the key board and let my mind free.
These days, however, while I mentally compose stirring turns of phrase all day, once the children are asleep my mind just as weary as my feet. Keeping up with a 4.5 year old who is capable of first grade math, and a 6.5 year old who is seemingly never filled with enough knowledge and begs for just one more chapter in history, or lesson in science, or chapter in reading is proving to be more taxing on my mind than when they were 1 and 3 and seemingly inexhaustible in physical exertion alone.
Additionally, despite what I felt at the time, the older the child, the more complicated are the needs that must be met. I have taken up sewing, because the mackerdoodle wants to wear long skirts, and keeps growing out of the ones she has. A four minute board book will no longer satisfy any of the children, so we are reading chapter books, and then discussing them. The questions are harder, the needs no longer limited to food and kisses, and when the day comes to an end I find that the deep thoughts from breakfast have atrophied.
I don’t normally struggle with comparison, but lately I have begun to wonder, how do these other homeschooling women do it? How do they find the time and the mental energy to write so frequently? When do they blog, and when do they educate, and when do they sort out the odd socks?
I don’t know. All I know is that it has taken me three days to write four paragraphs. Maybe that’s how they do it. Maybe They just write what they can, when they can.